Mastering Recovery: 5 Strategies for Sobriety & Success

Mastering Recovery: 5 Strategies to Sobriety & Success

5 Strategies for Sobriety & Success

The college experience is often synonymous with freedom, exploration, and self-discovery. For many, it’s a time filled with social gatherings, late-night parties, and an abundance of opportunities to indulge in the temptations that surround us. I was well into my recovery journey when I decided to get  my master’s degree. My sponsor urged me to aim high and work hard; if I could master sobriety I could take on any graduate program; and I was accepted to the University of Chicago. As I reflect on my own journey, I am compelled to share the story of how sobriety became a catalyst for personal growth, resilience, and the cultivation of authentic connections amidst the vibrant chaos of college life. Earning a graduate degree and mastering recovery is possible if you follow these 5 strategies for sobriety and success. 

Establish a Strong Support System

One of the most crucial aspects of maintaining sobriety in college is building a supportive network around you. Seek out like-minded individuals who share your commitment to sobriety. This can be achieved by joining campus organizations or clubs centered around activities that do not involve alcohol or drugs, such as athletic teams, volunteer groups, or academic societies. Surrounding yourself with individuals who understand and respect your choices will provide a sense of community and make it easier to resist peer pressure. I found that when you seek out clubs that are focused around your area of study, people are committed to the content and substance use is typically not a part of the network. 

Utilize Campus Resources

Colleges and universities often offer a variety of resources aimed at supporting students’ well-being. Take advantage of counseling services, support groups, and substance-free events provided by your institution. These resources can provide a safe space to share your experiences, seek advice, and connect with others who are also on a sober journey. Additionally, many campuses have student health centers that provide confidential counseling and medical assistance for substance-related issues. Reach out to these professionals whenever you need guidance or support. These people are there to help you, and you don’t need to be in a dire situation to utilize resources made available to you. 

Engage in Healthy Activities

Filling your schedule with healthy and fulfilling activities is an effective way to stay sober in college. Engage in regular exercise, as physical activity has been shown to improve mood and reduce cravings. Join a gym or participate in intramural sports to keep yourself active and meet new friends who share your interest in a healthy lifestyle. Explore hobbies and interests outside of the party scene. Whether it’s painting, writing, playing an instrument, or any other creative outlet, these activities can provide a sense of fulfillment and help distract you from the temptation of substance use.

The great thing about being on a college campus is that there is always something to do. If you fill your time with substance free activities, you won’t have time for anything else. Additionally, there are AA meetings everywhere, including your college campus. Attending a program is often a nice break from studying. 

Plan Ahead for Social Events

Attending social events can be daunting when you’re trying to stay sober. However, with proper planning and preparation, you can navigate these situations successfully. Before heading to a party or gathering, consider driving yourself or arranging a safe and sober ride home. Offer to be the designated driver for your friends. This will reinforce your commitment to sobriety and allow you to contribute positively to the group. Additionally, have a few non-alcoholic drink options in mind. 

You can always fall back on your need to get more rest or study time in. There is no need to apologize for dipping out of an event when you start to feel overwhelmed. Learning the art of the “Irish goodbye” and leaving without notice is a perfectly fine way to step away from potential substance use. 

Seek Professional Help When Needed

Finally, if you’re struggling with maintaining sobriety in college, don’t hesitate to seek professional help. Substance abuse counselors, therapists, or addiction specialists can provide the guidance and tools necessary to overcome challenges and build a solid foundation for long-term recovery. Reach out to your college’s counseling center or consult with your primary care physician for referrals to qualified professionals. At Adam Banks Recovery, we can assess your situation and point you in the right direction. I certainly understand how it feels to balance the pressures of graduate school and sobriety. 

While staying sober in college can be demanding, it is certainly achievable with the right strategies in place. Surrounding yourself with a supportive network, utilizing campus resources, engaging in healthy activities, planning for social events, and seeking professional help when needed are all effective ways to ensure a successful and sober college experience. Remember, your decision to stay sober is a powerful one, and it will pave the way for a brighter future filled with personal growth and academic success. These “wins” in life prove that your recovery will be followed by success. 

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail come from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, and the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

The Potato Chip: Can They Ever Drink Again?

The Potato Chip: Can She Ever Drink Again?

The Big Question

‘The Potato Chip’ is a response to a question that I get from every family and addicted person. They always ask, “Can they ever drink again?”

We don’t really know if someone can return to drinking. That is a decision that will be made down the line, in early recovery. There should be a commitment to abstinence. It is safe to assume that returning to use is a bad idea. Most successful people need to be completely abstinent.

The Potato Chip

Let’s draw an analogy to something that we all have experienced. The lowly potato chip.

I can go months and months without thinking about eating a potato chip.  That is until I walk by the big back of salt and vinegar chips at Costco.  In a split second, I justify to myself why I should be the bag, ‘The kids are coming this weekend’ or ‘I will get them for BBQ hamburgers’. 

I have already told myself a lie or I made a veiled attempt to justify my purchase.

Once the bag of chips is on my kitchen counter, I begin to think about chips more and more, I start to crave them.  I know chips are bad for me, but man-o-man, I want one.

A Small Concession

“I will just have one”, is the lie that I tell myself.  The second I have one, that bag is going to be half-eaten.  I have one, and I can’t stop, I will eat as many as are on my plate, I will eat a quarter of the bag. I may try to stop after taking a nibble and stepping away for a while. However, all I can think about is potato chips. Like an animal eating a raw stack, I need more chips and it’s all I can think about.

I return to the panty, careful to open the bag without anyone else seeing me, and I eat a bowlful of chips.

Once I had the first chip, my obsession, and cravings for chips reignited.  Once I have one chip, I can’t really tell you what I will do next, I might stop at one, or I might finish an entire bag.

From Snack to Obsession

Potato chips are designed to be addictive, and the crunch, taste, fat content, and salt; millions of dollars of research have been put into chips to make them addictive.  Our minds stand no chance of overcoming the addictiveness of a chips recipe.

Having one drink of alcohol is much like attempting to have one potato chip.  Once the door opens, I have triggered a craving response in me that I can’t control. For me, it is safer to never attempt having “just one drink”.  I bet I would have one the first day, and after a few days, I would be obsessed about having more.

Can He Control his Drinking in the Future?

It is the desire of every person that has an addiction that they can “get it under control” and have an occasional drink.  I am often asked, “will he ever be able to have a drink in the future?”

Think about not eating a potato chip for 4 years, you get your potato chip addiction under control.  What would happen to you after a 4 year potato chip hiatus?  Would it taste the same?  Would your desire for more immediately come back.

Think about how miserable you would be if you forcibly allowed yourself only 1 potato chip a day?  I know that I would spend an inordinate amount of my day thinking about that one chip, almost drooling for it and looking forward to it all day long.  I would eat 1 chip, and I would want more.  In fact 1 chip sounds awful to me, I would be short tempered after my 1 chip, snapping at people in displeasure.  My cravings for more chips would be all that was on my mind.

It wouldn’t take me long to figure ways around my 1 chip rule, I would stop by 7-11 and eat a bag of chips in the car, I would sneak some out of the bag in the house, I would lie to my spouse about eating extra chips.  It wouldn’t take me long before I was eating way more than one chip a day.

Want Some Chips?

What are your thoughts right now?  Has reading this triggered a craving for potato chips in you? If you went to a grocery store right now, would you be more or less likely to buy chips?  Will you think about chips as you go to sleep tonight?

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail come from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, and the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Hope

Restoring hope to your situation is an important reason to hire an interventionist. We go into an intervention on the side of the addicted person, or “AP.” We hold confidence that they have the willpower and capability to recover. It is understandable that at this point, family members feel they have lost any sense of hope. The fact that the family has folded won’t change the AP’s behavior.  

During an intervention, we don’t drag along the baggage of the past. We assess where we are at today, and create a plan going forward from today. To start a new page with your loved one, we need to let them off the hook from the past and focus on what can be changed today. There will be plenty of time for the family to repair damage once we get your loved one into treatment. 

We have seen worst case scenarios that have totally changed course. If we show the addicted person our faith in them, we can give them the confidence they need.

Make a Plan

Planning is the most important part of an intervention. If we take the time to consider the needs of the addicted person while creating a long term recovery plan, calm will be restored and further crisis will be averted. The entire family dynamic will shift in a positive direction.

An intervention is like hiring a consultant for a critical project, and all important projects take time. We step in with experience and expertise to implement tactics that solve addiction. There are oversight meetings, schedules and budgeting. The consultant creates harmony among the team and leads the project through its timeline. 

It has taken a great deal for the AP to reach their current state, and it will take work for them to leave it. On our first call with families, they often remark, “can you just handcuff them and drop them off at rehab.” Such a forceful action seems reasonable to a family at wits end. However, the only true resolution is a long-term recovery plan executed over time. Love gets people into recovery, not force.

Dropping someone off at rehab is the first step on a long journey. Consider that for the AP this will be a lifetime journey of sobriety. Success depends on the long term support of their family. This may seem daunting, but our 12 lessons bring understanding and relief to all cases. 

Families are powerful and resilient, when a plan is in place, the family moves as a group, circling the AP with the option of recovery. Hope thrives when we have the chance to teach families how to carry out a recovery plan.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

The Opposite of Addiction is Connection

The opposite of addiction is connection. Regardless of outward behaviors, an addict’s deepest craving is to be part of their families. The exhaustion and negative feelings created by substance causes them to appear apathetic towards the damage addiction leaves behind. The only way to combat the negative consequences of addiction is to meet it with love and positive support. When a family shows up for an AP, they are often inspired to get on the path to recovery.

  • Alcoholics and addicts crave the approval of their families. 
  • Apathetic or angry behavior is the result of carrying an addiction. 
  • The only way to overcome an individual’s negative mindset is for a family to meet it head on with love and positive support. 
  • When family’s show up, the addicted person knows they have the strength to recover. 

Bring Back the Family

Alcoholics and addicts crave the approval of their families. Outwardly, they act as if they don’t need anyone. This is a deception. They are attempting to hide shame and protect their addiction. If we consider guilt and the weight of their burden, we cannot expect them to react positively to judgment. Interventions are possible when everyone stays in the present and focuses on the solution. We cannot hold the past over an addicted person’s head. This is a new beginning.

An intervention is an invitation for the AP to rejoin the family. By giving alcoholics love, appreciation, and respect, we can show how deeply we believe in their recovery. When friends and family show up, both physically and emotionally, it is hard for an addicted person to let everyone down. 

Most interventions end with the addicted person feeling relief when they witness the family’s support. An outpouring of love will turn a new page. This is often the first time people realize that the opposite of addiction is connection. Sincerity will ignite a profound emotional shift, signaling an opportunity to find a solution. Interventions save lives. Survival depends on a family working together.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Recovery is a Journey

Recovery is a Journey

This is a stressful time for both the person seeking recovery and the family. Adam Banks Recovery is there to help along the entire process. We understand that success hinges on the implementation of a well thought out plan. While our loved one is in recovery the family will continue to work, digging deep at the root causes of addiction. After a successful intervention, a multidimensional plan will set everyone towards long term recovery.

  • The journey may seem difficult, but Adam will act as an experienced guide. 
  • Recovery starts with initial treatment, but hinges on a well thought out plan.
  • While our loved one recovers, the family continues to work on understanding addiction and setting boundaries.
  • After a successful intervention, a multidimensional action plan for long term recovery begins. 

Welcome to the start of a recovery journey. Considering going to treatment or sending a loved one to treatment is a very stressful time. There’s a lot to learn in just a few days. 

We understand that a month-long rehab is just the beginning of a life in recovery. By the time treatment is over, the family must have a plan in place to support long-term recovery. We’ve worked through different options with families, and there are many ways that this plan can look. 

First and foremost it has to be something that the person in recovery will adhere to. The plan will include where the person will live, what programs they will attend, and any financial support they may need. The work is not over after successfully placing a recovering person in a treatment facility. To a certain extent, the hard work is still to come.

While your loved one is in treatment, we can work together to look at the dynamics at home that may have encouraged or enabled addiction. Often, family members have inadvertently become caught up in the cycle of addiction. The process begins slowly, without anyone realizing what is happening, and becomes a cyclone that sweeps up other people, careers, and finances. While the patient is in treatment, the team at Adam Banks Recovery works with the family to set boundaries.

After a successful intervention ends, the family can breathe a sigh of relief. But, there are many more steps to come to help the family cope, change, and shift their dynamics. For a family that has been dealing with a loved one’s addiction for many years, the success of an intervention can be jarring. It is especially crucial that a multidimensional, thorough aftercare plan is in place.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

The Other Crisis

The other crisis is often overlooked. It is easy to identify a family’s primary crisis, the addicted person. We know that they are on a path of destruction and they have likely caused significant damage prior to an intervention. 

Forms of a Secondary Crisis 

  • Retired parents spend limited money to help their adult child; paying the mortgage, rent or giving an allowance.
  • Abuse or theft towards elderly parents by an addicted person (AP).
  • Spouse/partners lying to “cover up” what is actually going on in the home.
  • Spouse/partner that has been isolated from family, or family has been turned against the healthy spouse that is doing their best.
  • Stressed out partner effectively raising children alone to “keep it all together.”
  • Child Protective Services involvement.
  • Financial problems of the AP and their family, money is missing or not going to the family as a whole.
  • Intense arguing in a couple, yelling and possibly safety issues.
  • Children having enough emotional intelligence to understand that one of their parents is acting weird.
  • Adult children that argue with their parents about how to handle an addicted sibling.
  • Adult children that no longer have a relationship with a parent that is addicted.
  • Parents that spend time worrying and arguing about an A.

 The family desperately wants to fix the primary crisis of getting their loved one sober. The AP is a wildcard; we don’t know if or when they will choose recovery. However, we can start to fix the secondary crisis immediately. This will bring the family peace no matter what the AP decides. 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Goals

Goals

Goals get our loved one into treatment. However, there are many secondary goals, critical to recovery, that need to be addressed. During the intervention families need to reflect on the true goals they have for the addicted person. This exercise will help families define what changes need to be made, and what support actions need to happen after treatment. 

  • Sobriety is a primary goal, but what other issues need to be addressed in order to support recovery. Ask yourself these tough questions. 
  • Define goals so that the family can draw boundaries and support recovery in the most effective way possible. 
  • Adjusting to a new life will be difficult. Spend time working on a plan so that all bases are covered when your loved one returns home. 
  • The family plan should accommodate for at least six months after one month in a treatment center. Adam Banks Recovery will be involved over the long term recovery journey. 
  • Solve the “other crisis”

What Do you Really Want?

When I’m speaking with a family member before an intervention, I typically hear, “All I want is for them to stop drinking.” I often ask, “Are you sure that’s all you want?” The family member thinks about it for a second, and usually responds with a list of additional goals like, “Well, I want them to get a job, move out of the house, and lose their bad friends.”

The family doesn’t just want the person to stop drinking. They want an entirely new life for the person they’re concerned about. New lives don’t happen overnight, and that’s why Adam Banks Recovery interventions are lasting engagements.

A proper intervention takes time. Sure, a person may enter treatment after just one meeting, but then what? What’s the plan for re-entry? How will they cope with leaving their old life and starting a new one? How do we prevent them from going back to the old ways?

What Needs to be Fixed?

An AP likely fell behind in life, maybe living at home for too long or didn’t finish school, or worked dead end jobs for too long. For recovery to be successful, we need to create a plan that will help them to catch up and make them feel valued again. There will be ups and downs along the way. The family will need to learn how to help someone in the process of changing. The AP will need a lot of support as they take slow steps towards a new way of living. 

When considering an intervention, ask yourself:

  • Is drug or alcohol use the only problem that needs to be fixed?
  • Is the individual living at home? If so, do I want them to move out?
  • Is the individual honest about their whereabouts?
  • Is the individual stealing?
  • Does the individual pose danger to the family?
  • Does the individual act as a good parent?
  • Is there a risk of legal problems?
  • Do you like the people that the individual spends time with?
  • How is the individual doing in school or at work?

Understanding your goals will help to define the work that needs to be planned for successful recovery. Getting someone on a new path takes more time than a 28-day residential program will achieve. Thinking about these goals will help you to frame what has to happen after rehab is over. Ultimately, there must be a six-month plan in place for the person to have a successful recovery.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Develop a Plan

Develop a Plan

Recovery demands that you develop a plan. There are some major benchmarks to celebrate and specific discomforts to expect. The first 90 days of recovery is critical to long term success. We have created a timeline for the initial stages of recovery. It will provide a better understanding of the overall experience and what to expect during this exceptional change in your loved one’s life. 

  • The first two weeks of recovery demand a great deal of love and support from the family. This will be an emotional rollercoaster for our loved one. 
  • Towards the completion of the first month, the family will start to recognize their loved one as they were before the addiction. It’s important to not remain steady in support, the second month is often the most difficult
  • The second month involves the AP leaving treatment and returning with newfound sobriety. The transition will cause our loved one a great deal of anxiety, and family empathy is critical at this point
  • Month 3 is a milestone for our loved one. They are wrapping up outpatient treatment and settling into a new life. Meetings and other forms of support must be in place to maintain long term sobriety. 

Weeks 1-2

During the first few weeks, their mind and body may consistently yearn for their substance of choice. Stability feels distant and unattainable. In this initial stage, the subconscious encourages the AP to give into strong cravings. Emotions feel raw and unpredictable because for the first time, we need develop a plan and stick to it to overcome this anxiety. 

When we assess a person for inpatient treatment, we evaluate the AP for the likelihood of them maintaining their sobriety for the first two weeks. Most people can force themselves sober for three or four days, but will they be able to remain sober after a week, when emotions begin to run wild? 

Emotions during the first week tend to swing between extremes. During the first few weeks, APs tend to be angry at their family for “punishing them” and sending them to treatment. They are angry at the treatment center and angry at the people helping them. They have very little insight into why they are actually at the treatment center.

 Everyone has heard stories of someone detoxing for a few days, and immediately returning to use. If we don’t develop a plan and get the AP through this emotional phase, they will not be successful. 

Weeks 3-4 (Month 1)

In the third week of recovery, family and friends begin to recognize their loved one as the person they were before the addiction took hold. “He sounds like his old self,” family members claim. The AP has started to stabilize though the emotional detox. Families will witness a significant shift in the AP, they will understand why they need rehab, and they will begin to see the damage that they have done and show remorse for their behaviors.

As hope begins to stir within them, they may become friendlier and more engaged with their treatment team, making new friends that are also working on continued recovery. Changes made in this first month are significant. For everyone involved, the future looks brighter every day. The AP might start showing overconfidence in their recovery. They will say, “I am glad I came here, I learned my lessons and I know that I will never drink again.” They will convince their family that they are fixed. What they don’t know is that the second month is still difficult.

Month 2

The AP has likely been discharged from the treatment center, returned home, and is in the process of transitioning back into everyday life. During this period, we want to keep an individual busy with recovery work, treatment and programming.

After treatment, the AP is exposed to all the stimuli that supported their use just a few weeks ago. To be sympathetic to an AP during this period, I tell family members to envision anxiety. This anxiety is closely tied to cravings for a substance. 

 In the first few months, there are a lot of firsts: first time going to a restaurant and not drinking, first time hanging out with friends and not drinking, first time they feel happiness and sadness without drinking.

We have to be in a position to carry the AP through this tough month. On the outside they will display overconfidence. The AP may feel they have figured out. If we can get the AP into the 3rd month sober, their emotions will calm down, and they will settle into recovery.

Month 3

In AA, one of the most significant milestones that is celebrated is when someone reaches 90 days. It’s celebrated as a veritable coming of age. The difficulty of early sobriety is over, and there is a shift to maintaining lasting sobriety.

For most people in recovery, the third month is rewarding. They begin to return to themselves. The intensity of the emotions and cravings of the first two months has tapered off, and less recovery work is required to keep them on track.

At this stage, most APs graduate from outpatient treatment and begin settling into programs. It is necessary to maintain a level of commitment throughout the journey to ensure that a decrease in recovery work doesn’t dwindle into no recovery work. Month 3 is about finding a healthy balance between recovery and “real life.”

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Next Steps

Next Steps

In the process of recovery, we must consider the next steps. Small actions beget big changes.  I encourage you to reach out to us and tell us about your situation.  The education of the course, paired with professional guidance will help you to overcome addiction.  

Summary:

When considering treatment, some feel like sobriety is a life sentence. They can’t imagine never drinking again and it feels like a giant invisible hand is forcing them to get sober. Getting sober is a choice you make for self-improvement. Just like any program of self-improvement, it requires a daily commitment to change.

  • Although many of the expressions in the Twelve Step programs seem a bit cliche to a person new in recovery, they ring true as sobriety is maintained. 
  • An addicted person can choose to drink at any time. However, they have chosen to do the work instead. The positive effects compound each day. 
  • Choosing to become sober is choosing to live a completely new lifestyle. 

One Day at a Time

“Take it one day at a time” is a common piece of advice in Twelve Step programs. When I was in early sobriety, that expression, and many others in the program annoyed me. I knew that it wasn’t one day at a time; my time was up. I had to be sober for the rest of my life. My sponsor reminded me often that I could choose to drink any day. That, too, felt like a trick, because deep down I knew that I could never drink again, even though I wanted to.

Today, 12 years sober, I understand that I could drink today, but I don’t want to. Every day I make the choice to remain sober, just as I have every day for the last twelve years.

Next Steps & New Lifestyles

I liken the decision to choose sobriety to the decision to become a vegan. People choose to become vegans for health or ethical reasons. Often, they consider making this choice for some time, they waiver about it, they research how to do it. At some point, they make their decision and do the work of avoiding meat. They tell their friends, they frequent establishments that support their lifestyle, and they make new friends that share the same lifestyle. 

As they build their new, vegan-centered lives, the lifestyle becomes enjoyable; they’re proud of their accomplishments, and often report that they feel better, have more energy, and can’t imagine going back to eating meat.

A vegan makes the choice to remain a vegan every day. Certainly there may be temptations to “fall off the wagon.” Many restaurants don’t have adequate vegan options and a sizzling steak may suddenly look appealing. It’s more difficult to fully commit to the lifestyle than to choose the easier path.

Nevertheless, the person remains true to their convictions. Quitting drinking is not so different – it’s a lifestyle choice, made for health reasons. When someone chooses to quit using drugs or alcohol, they build a lifestyle around sobriety, finding friends that share the same values and eschewing a former culture. 

With time, they feel proud of their choices and even feel better. They don’t wake up sick anymore, they argue less, and their lives improve in ways they couldn’t have imagined. With each day, the commitment to remain sober becomes easier and easier. 

At some point, drinking again becomes unthinkable. Yes, it is one day at a time, but it’s also the lifestyle that I’ve chosen.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

How to Use The Intervention Course

How to Use The Intervention Course

Considering doing an intervention on a loved one is fraught with emotion.  The desire or need to do an intervention always comes after (or during) a crisis.  If you are considering an intervention, think no further – your loved one needs help – and it has become your calling to step in and offer a lifeline.  The truth is that your loved one is probably desperate for help.

For you to be helpful, you have to learn a lot and learn it fast.  We have created resources to help educate you and lay out a path for you.  This course is broken down into 19 short videos and text to accompany each lesson.  By going through these videos, you will be preparing yourself to plan for a treatment center placement, addressing your loved one with compassion, and supporting long term change.

This video course is accompanied by the book, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery‘ available on Amazon.

Addiction causes chaos, to navigate out of the chaos there needs to be a plan.   Families that take time to educate themselves on addiction, and follow a path, always have success at changing the current situation for the better.

Course Index

Follow these links to all course modules:

Introduction to Addiction Intervention

  1. Hope
  2. Opposite of Addiction is Connection
  3. Recovery is a Journey
  4. The Other Crisis
  5. Learned Helplessness and Siloing
  6. Goals
  7. What an Intervention Looks Like
  8. Intervention is Fair
  9. When is an Intervention Necessary?
  10. Stages of Change
  11. Addiction Myths
  12. Develop a Plan
  13. Fear of Success, Fear of Failure
  14. Coaching Intervention
  15. Facility Placement
  16. Lessons from the Pilot Program
  17. Cellphone Analogy
  18. Next Steps

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

The Cell Phone Analogy

The Cell Phone Analogy

I use The Cell Phone analogy as an exercise with families to build their compassion and understanding for how an addicted person feels during an intervention. Think for a minute about me taking away your cell phone. Our behaviors and habits create anxiety similar to addiction. 

  • We often don’t realize how strong an addiction is until we face the world “sober.” These instances cause instant panic. 
  • Although it’s possible, it’s hard to imagine life without the addiction. 
  • After treatment it takes work to learn how to navigate life and social experiences without a crutch. 
  • Triggers and other circumstances elevate the risk of relapse at any time. It’s critical that those in long term recovery anticipate these challenges. 

Taking Away the Cell Phone

Most people have a minor (or maybe full-blown) addiction to their phone. The second I realize my phone is missing, I turn into a rabid addict, digging through couch cushions and looking underneath the seats of my car, probably several times. Without my phone in my hand, it is nearly impossible for me to maintain my peace of mind.

I try to look calm and collected when it’s missing, unbothered, but it’s only a matter of a few minutes before I have a total meltdown where I’m frantically pacing around my house and blaming others for my issue. It’s all I can think about when it’s missing, and the second I find it, I feel momentary relief. I need this phone.

Imagine if I pulled you into a room where all of your loved ones were sitting down, and I asked (or demanded) that you give up your cell phone. In a dramatic fashion, we tell you how your cell phone use hurts us, how each minute you’re on your phone is robbing us of time we want to spend with you. 

Intervention

We approach you with compassion because we know yelling at you will only incite an argument. We take our time showing you the negative impact of your phone. You reluctantly agree, the phone has taken over your life. 

Imagine your phone was confiscated today with no promise of it being returned. Would your feelings match any of the ones listed below?

  • Anxiety that something important was gone from your life.
  • A physical sense that something was missing from your hand.
  • Fear of missing out on an important text or email.
  • Concerned that the dreadful feelings will never go away.
  • An inability to function in the world without a phone.
  • Anger at the person who took your phone away.

For most people in society, life without a cell phone feels unimaginable. Think of the anxiety you would have going phone-sober. Some of us have lived without a cell phone before, we would have to dust off our cell-phone less life skills, others have never lived without a mobile phone, they can’t even comprehend this new life.

Life without a Mobile Phone

Take your phone sobriety a step further, now imagine “going sober” from your phone, and you set out to be cell phone abstinent for a year. You have a lot of work to do in the first month, you need to call the phone company and get a landline installed, you need to find a phone book, you need to get a handwritten address book, and ask people what their number is, so you can write it down. Oh, and you will need to figure out how to work a fax machine. 

You will have to constantly explain to friends that you no longer text. You feel you will be letting them down, as they enjoyed texting with you over the years and now have trouble communicating with you. Your best friends might even pressure you to use your phone again. But you’re committed, you’re going to stay phone-sober. 

Adapting to a new Lifestyle

The first month will be hard and filled with anxiety. In your second and third months of being phone-sober, you might calm down a bit, you’re over the anger, and you’re mostly committed to being phone sober, but many days, it feels like it would just be easier to go back to using a cell phone. “Everyone else is doing it” you explain.

This phone analogy is relatable and gives people a better understanding of addiction. The situation is far-fetched, yet it is a direct reflection of the experience and emotions our loved one feels on their journey to recovery. Use this analogy to put yourself in the place of the AP so that you can enter the intervention process with understating and compassion.

My Real Experience with the Mobile Phone Analogy

I went to a 5-day retreat a few years back, and I had to give up my phone. After the retreat I didn’t use my phone as much, I remember thinking how much extra time I had. For a few weeks after that phone detox, I was able to devote my attention to people and things without looking down at the phone. I enjoyed removing my reliance on a phone to feel okay. I am sure that if I committed to going phone-sober, after a few months, I would likely be totally happy in my new way of life. You know how my story ends, after a few weeks, I fully relapsed and have been using my phone the same as I always have. The experience really makes the cell phone analogy hit home. 

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Facility Placement

Facility Placement

Recovery happens when a structured plan is followed over a period of time. We will look at the different options of facility placement including residential treatment, detox, and intensive outpatient treatment. 

  • Residential treatment is an ideal option for recovery. There are many different types of treatment centers, choosing the best option for your loved one will ensure success. 
  • Detox is a short term residential option that typically lasts three days to a week. Depending on the AP’s level of use, this type of medical attention may be necessary. 
  • An Intensive Outpatient Program (IOP) is an option for those seeking treatment outside of a residential program. Although it does not require leaving home, it demands a great deal of work including meetings and therapies that account for at least 11 hours a week. 

Residential Treatment

When considering facility placement, residential treatment is the fastest way to ensure positive change. The family has already been through many empty promises to cut back, only to fall in the cycle of addiction again. The promise to change after an intervention will only last a few days. It is best to seize the moment that the AP agrees to get help and get them secure in a residential program.

There are many programs across the country with a wide array of approaches to treatment. Research needs to be done to find the best program for your loved one. This includes consideration of their personality, desires, psychiatric issues, and financial capabilities. Only performing a Google search is not the best way to find a treatment center. This is a time when you need to seek out professional guidance for the optimal treatment program.

Residential treatment may be the only option if an addicted person does not live in a stable environment. It is likely stress levels are high at home, stepping out of the home and living in residential might be the only option to get started on the right foot.

Considering Rehab For Facility Placement

While most people dread the thought of going to inpatient treatment, we often find that afterward, they look back on rehab as one of the best things that they did.  In life, we rarely get an opportunity to take 30 days off, just for ourselves, to focus on our mental health. The opportunity is too good to not offer it to your AP. 

Choosing a treatment program needs to start with finances. Most insurances cover inpatient treatment. Treatment centers differ in what insurance they accept. Begin with your loved one’s insurance ID card and ask several treatment centers to run the benefits of that specific insurance. 

Your loved one will have hesitation about going to an inpatient facility. The family should consider what objections the addicted person will have such child or pet care, pet care and work obligations. List all the potential objections and work through them before the intervention.

Detox

Detox is a short residential level of care. It might not be safe to wean off of drugs or alcohol without medical (physician) supervision. Detox is typically 3 days to a week, depending on the AP’s pattern of use in the weeks leading up to check in. If the AP has had seizures in the past while using, medical detox is required. Most residential treatment programs (rehabs) offer detox on sight.

A stand-alone detox is an option if the AP has a strong and legitimate at-home plan for recovery. A detox on-site at a residential program is preferred, as people that complete detox often want to return home and are unlikely to go on to a 28-day residential program once discharged.

IOP

There are alternative options to facility placement. Intensive Outpatient Treatment (IOP) is a structured program for recovery that typically runs for 6 weeks. IOP consists of meetings, group therapy, and private sessions with a psychiatrist and therapist. Many people find that IOP is a better option than residential, as they don’t have to take 30 days out of their life and can continue working. There is minimal transition back to “real life” upon discharge. 

The addicted person will always choose this option during an intervention because it seems like minimal commitment. It is best to not lead with this option in an intervention, as the AP might see this as an “easy way out.” The family gets their hopes up, and two weeks later, they learn that the AP is not attending the IOP. An out-patent program might not give the family what they need, stability and trust.  We assess the living situation of the AP when determining if an IOP will be successful. If the AP’s home life is stressful, or there is a lot of use in the house, IOP may not be effective.

Detoxing before IOP

IOP’s will not accept someone that is actively drinking, a stand-alone detox is the ideal entry point into an IOP. The family must create benchmarks (i.e. “if you continue to drink after 1 week, it means that IOP is not intense enough, and you agree to enter into residential treatment”). Starting with IOP is excellent, as it expands the team of people working with the addicted person. IOP is very successful. They are always recommended after residential treatment to help get the AP into their second and third months of recovery.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Recovery Fear

Recovery Fear

The road to recovery can feel daunting for your loved one. They will be facing the fear of both success and failure. They will deal with the anxiety of replacing old habits and the possibility of a relapse. Substance use has been a form of security for them. We must walk with our loved one and take sobriety one moment at a time. This removes anxiety over the unknown, relieving recovery fear. 

  • The AP is dropping their shield of addiction. They will feel vulnerable and overwhelmed by the idea of living sober. We must show them that success is possible. 
  • The AP is also facing the anxiety of letting everyone down. This time is different, they have committed to change and have started the work. We cannot allow fear of failure to creep in. 
  • This is a marathon, not a sprint. Take sobriety one moment at a time. 

Understand Fear of Success and Failure

Most of your loved one’s reactions towards treatment stem from a place of fear. It’s a completely new environment, filled with unfamiliar faces, routines, and conditions. Anyone would be scared!

Try to understand that the AP is afraid of success and failure, simultaneously. At the point of going to rehab, the thought of going a few days without using is unimaginable. Considering a lifetime without drugs or alcohol is beyond comprehension for the AP. After all, they’ve likely engaged in daily use for years and have never been able to stop using for more than a few days. The AP is also losing a reliable friend, one that they turned to when they were happy and when they were sad. Success means giving up their entire way of life.

An AP is also afraid of failure, a return to use would deplete their self-esteem and let their family down. They want to get better, and feel a sense of pressure to prove it to their family. Going back to old ways after all the work that has been done would be disappointing. Your AP is stuck. Both paths look risky, and just continuing with the status quo of using seems easier and safer.

Empathy is a key virtue during intervention, understanding that the responses from your AP come out of a place of fear and are typically shown outwardly as anger. By understanding recovery fear, you can approach them with compassion, imagine how you would have approached the AP as a fearful 12-year-old and bring that same compassion to them today. An old adage from AA is “one day at a time.” Right now, your loved one needs to take it one minute at a time to fully accept treatment.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Lessons from the Pilot Program

Lessons from the Pilot Program

We believe that a stay at rehab is only the beginning of treatment. Therefore, there needs to be a solid plan in place for families. This will help them hold an individual accountable over a duration of time. Our goal is to not only help the person suffering from addiction, but help the family heal as well. The success of programs for pilots like the Human Motivation Study (HIMS) and Physician Health Program (PHP) outline ideal forms of treatment. 

  • The success of HIMS and PHP prove that long term planning and structure are key components of achieving sobriety. 
  • Clear boundaries allow for positive and negative consequences. 
  • Role models and recovery mentors are very effective towards accountability. 
  • Recovery is anchored in the family. Addiction takes its toll on the entire family, and it is imperative that everyone works together as one unit after treatment. 

Success Elements of HIMS and PHP

There are two very successful programs with proven results for long-term recovery. They are; the Human Intervention Motivation Study (HIMS) for pilots and Physician Health Program (PHP) for physicians. Both programs boast an above an 80% success rate at long-term recovery. Other general programs without a similar foundation have a success rate of less than 20%.

These programs share a few things in common, including long-term care (up to 5 years) and structured planning. To increase the success of rehab, our family recovery program borrows elements from these treatment plans. 

Lesson from the pilot program like PHP and HIMS start with the fact that they WILL be successful. Families can benefit from adopting this positive mindset. 

The successful programs for pilots and doctors are based on Eight Essential Elements.

Positive Rewards and Negative Consequences

The family sets a clear definition of what a successful recovery looks like. Consequently, a reward system is established when expectations are met. If there is a return to using, there are consequences that help facilitate recovery.

Frequent Drug Testing

In the case of HIMS and PHP, pilots and doctors are required to undergo routine drug testing for 5 years. A drug test or breathalyzer can be a great deterrent for returning to use. And in the event of a relapse, it allows the family to respond quickly.

12-Step Programs and Abstinence Standards

APs and family members will to seek the help of 12-step programs and participate both together and separately. The expectation is that abstinence is the only measurable standard of success.

Viable Role Models and Recovery Mentors

In early recovery, it is important for AP’s to have the support of peer groups. This is necessary to put in greater perspective what a successful recovery could look like. Recovery coaches and/or sponsors help to teach the person of concern what they know about recovery.

Modified Lifestyles

As recovery enhancing decisions are supported and encouraged, living situations, careers, and relationships may have to change. The family will support positive transitions. Lessons from the pilot program teach us that we must consider sobriety a part of our new lifestyle. 

Active and Sustained Monitoring 

Third party monitoring of drug tests and compliance with a program allows families to step out of the “policing” role. The AP should develop a trusting relationship with a team that can advocate for them.  Lessons from the pilot program create accountability for the person of concern. 

Active Managing of Relapse 

Early detection of relapse is a critical lesson from the pilot program. Returns to use are viewed as opportunities for individuals and their families to re-evaluate the plan. Consequently, they learn new information, and recommit to following a program.

Continuing Care Approach 

Similar to diabetes or any other chronic illness, addiction is a disease that requires ongoing management. A solid treatment plan considers the trajectory of the next 5 years. It also ensures that care extends beyond rehabilitation, towards sustained recovery. Integrating these eight elements in a recovery program produces sustainable, long-term recovery. Individuals don’t have access to the structured programs of pilots and doctors, but families can step in and offer similar support and structure.

Family Success

Addiction can take its toll on everyone in a family. It’s common to see in-fighting, emotional withdrawal, grief, and secret keeping. Families have reached the point of accepting chaos within their lives. However, the reality is that they are functioning to the best of their ability while dealing with long-term addiction. The family may not be dysfunctional, but they are in crisis. 

The success of our program is dependent on families agreeing to support their loved one on a defined new path. It’s a commitment to stand by them emotionally and physically for three months to even a year. 

The plan is put in place to allow the AP to join the family in a healthy way. It is provided while they undergo treatment and for several intense months after. Hopefully at that time, the family and the AP have shifted into maintaining long-term recovery. Committing to the Dynamic Family Recovery Program has some benefits. Lessons from the pilot program can be applied to help families learn how to support the needs of their loved one, combat the addiction, and re-stabilize their relationships. 

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

What an Intervention Looks Like

What an Intervention Looks Like

What an intervention looks like is not what you typically see on TV. To have a successful intervention we must consider what drives addiction and what roadblocks will attempt to hinder the path to recovery. Many of the concerns our loved one has can be anticipated and handled prior to entering treatment. When everyone involved participates in thorough planning it is easier for the addicted person to say yes to treatment. 

  • Intervention is not as seen on television. It is a loving experience void of drama. 
  • Addiction is driven by experiences, triggers, stages of change and the fear that accompanies making a transition. 
  • Roadblocks are common and will occur. Being proactive instead of reactive makes the process safe and secure. This increases the likelihood of getting a yes from the person of concern. 
  • Families need to have a plan for both a yes or no response during the intervention. The entire network should be educated and prepared to take action. 

What an intervention looks like is a formalized process that will bring the family and friends together. The process will not look like what you see on TV. It is a loving and supportive experience that invites the person of concern to participate.

Roadblocks to Treatment

All members of the intervention network need to learn about addiction. Prior to this point, the family may be exhausted by empty ultimatums, withdrawn or in some cases separated. Our first step will be to educate ourselves on what drives addiction.

  • People, places and things
  • Cravings and triggers
  • Stages of Change
  • Fear of failure and fear of success / losing everything that they know

To help someone enter into recovery, we need to clear the path for them. In all interventions we encounter similar roadblocks. We hear things like, “I can’t leave my job” or “I have to take care of the kids.”  We will anticipate these roadblocks and make preparations so that our loved one can say yes to recovery. 

Anticipate Roadblocks

  • Who in the family is supportive and who isn’t?
  • Does the quality of the facility match the expectations of POC?
  • Time off of work and who will take care of the children and/or pets?
  • Common concerns about treatment centers: smoking, vaping, cell phone, computer, roommate, etc.

What an intervention looks like is a planned event. We need to plan how to work with the individual of concern, and we need to develop a plan for a long-term recovery. If someone refuses treatment that is just the beginning; we don’t stop there, we regroup and we change our approach.

Cover Yourself

  • What happens next when the intervention is successful?
  • What happens if the individual changes their mind after saying yes?
  • Contingency plans for a “no.”
  • Transportation plans to the facility.
  • Review what to expect in the days following.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Intervention is Fair

Intervention is Fair

Move away from thinking that the intervention will be a one off emotional event, and consider intervention to be the entire process laid out in this course. Setting boundaries and expectations allows the family to work together in a supportive way. The experience is fair only when there is complete transparency among the entire network. Addiction thrives on secrecy. The family, including the AP, will unite as a team and begin this journey under an agreed upon contract. 

  • Interventions draw clear lines in the sand.
  • The family network is completely transparent.
  • The family acts as board of directors guided by a fair consensus. 
  • The intervention follows a four level process of escalation that ends in a mutual contract to seek treatment. 

Intervention is Clear

It’s up to the person of concern if they choose to continue using drugs and alcohol. They must understand that they hold the freedom of that choice. Their decision to use will be met with clearly defined consequences. We hope that these defined consequences will help them understand the severity of their addiction and how it is affecting the people around them and will push them into treatment

Intervention has witnesses

Prior to intervention, each family member may have attempted to draw boundaries on their own. This can be very difficult, especially against a fully developed addiction. The family must make decisions and draw consequences as a whole. Having one person with a contrasting set of boundaries will leave an opening for the addiction to attack. Coming together on one unified front leaves no room for the AP to manipulate the situation. If one person has to set specific boundaries, it is fair that they get to express that to the entire group, so everyone understands.

Intervention is fair

Intervention is fair when both sides are given an opportunity to tell what they need and what they want. A fair path forward is defined when both sides understand each other. The addicted person is free to make their own decision, while the family is justified in setting clear boundaries. 

Intervention stops secrets 

Prior to intervention, no one person has the entire story and each person is responding to the story that the AP has told them or what they see. Addiction thrives on secrecy and division among the family. While parents talk behind closed doors, siblings and friends keep secrets. Close friends typically know more than others when it comes to the person of concern’s habits. Think how unfair this is to family members, you’re all responding to the situation with partial information fed to you by the AP with the intent of keeping their addiction going. Intervention puts the whole truth onto the table so that addiction cannot play its secrets against the family. 

Intervention has consensus

The choice of the AP needs to be acceptable to both sides. It’s common to see the person of concern choosing a path of the least resistance, which comes across as unfair and ineffective to the family. The family will express what they need from the person of concern, the process they expect the AP to follow, and the accountability that the family needs to reestablish trust. Intervention is fair when everyone can reach a consensus. 

Intervention establishes a board of directors

Prior to intervention, each member of the family is left to figure out what to do on their own. Intervention is a group effort. It establishes a process for everyone to form a plan as one unit. The results of consequences of voiding this ‘family contract’ are clearly explained when boundaries are presented. It is critical that the group comes to a consensus on every decision. Going rogue will leave room for the addiction to divide and conquer this process.

Intervention Follows a Four Level Process

Interventions that follow a process almost always result in an agreement to seek treatment. We consider interventions to have 4 levels, escalating in intensity. We always want to remain at the least confrontation level. Sometimes we escalate up a level and then return to the lower level once the situation has become contained. The most assertive style of intervention is used as a last resort or in emergency situations.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

When is an Intervention Necessary?

When is an Intervention Necessary?

Recovery doesn’t require losing it all to begin healing. There is no need to hit the bottom before seeking treatment. Because addiction is hidden, we may not recognize when others truly need help. Entering treatment is a personal choice, and the best we can do to others is to help them realize the recurring consequences of addiction. 

  • The need to “hit rock bottom” is a recovery myth. 
  • Recovery is a personal choice, and we may not be aware of the emotional turmoil inside others who battle with addiction. 
  • Addiction is a slow moving train, accelerating slowly towards derailment. 
  • The goal is to help our loved one choose treatment by recognizing the consequences of substance use. 

One of the biggest blocks to seeking recovery is the myth that someone has to “hit rock bottom” before they can recover. The decision to recover can come at any time they’re ready for a new life. We can begin to recover as soon as the person is ready to be done with the sickness, the hangovers, and the consequences. Many young people have chosen recovery after just a few years of using.

I compare addiction to a freight train gaining speed. We are free to jump off at any point. Some people get off early, while the train is increasing in acceleration. Others wait until the train wheels get shaky, and some wait for derailment. 

But do they have to?

A lot of people look like they’re really happy when they’re using, and often their friends are surprised when they consider recovery. They may have an abundant life, houses, and a good job. However, on the inside, substance use is taking a huge emotional toll. When I chose to get sober, my life looked very abundant. In fact, I decided to get sober in a vacation house in the Hamptons. Inside, I was emotionless and very unhappy—but I never told anyone about my feelings.

People can choose recovery at any time, and we want to catch them before too many consequences have occurred. They don’t need to wait until they “lose everything” to recover. Many people don’t wait that long. I liken recovery to a self-help program that we choose for ourselves. We’ve all chosen workouts, medications, and diets for self-improvement. We consciously choose to adhere to those programs. Most people choose to diet, for instance, when they notice a few extra pounds—long before they become obese.

You can choose recovery any time you want. Most people that question their substance use have already reached an emotional bottom, whether they’re expressing it to others or not. What others see on the outside may not reflect what you’re feeling on the inside.

Let’s bust the myth that someone has to hit “rock bottom.” Let’s help people choose recovery before they hit that point. By intervening early, we can tap into someone’s emotional bottom. They might already be there.

Our goal with an intervention is to help someone see the consequences of their substance use, to shine a light on something that they are missing. We want to help them choose recovery at a point.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Coaching Intervention

Coaching Intervention

Sometimes the best intervention is one in which we work one-on-one with the person of concern. A traditional placement in rehab is not right for everyone. There are many options for recovery, and exploring these with the person of concern allows them to be in charge of their recovery.

Recovery coaching is helpful as:
  • An alternative to inpatient residential treatment.
  • A way to get back on track after relapse.
  • A structured after care plan after residential treatment.
  • An additional way to strengthen mutual-aid self-help groups.
Recovery coaching focuses on these principles:
  • Future-Focused: Navigate the present, and set goals for the future.
  • Professional Guidance: Follow proven plans with our 30- and 90-day programs.
  • Accountability: Reinforce accountability through meetings, phone calls, and homework.
  • Build on 12 Steps: Strengthen other programs with which you may be involved.
  • Real-Life: Learn how to stay sober in the actual environments where you live and work.

Most people respond very well to coaching interventions and many people can avoid in-patient treatment with daily accountability and connecting to the proper resources. You have the power to live a better life, let us guide you there. Together we will develop a plan that greatly increases your chances of succeeding.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Addiction Myths

Addiction Myths

Not only is addiction secretive, there are many myths about surrounding how it works and what are acceptable forms of treatment. These myths are perpetuated by both the addicted person and those who have yet to understand the recovery process. Prior to entering treatment, families should be prepared to handle one, if not many of these myths. 

  • As mentioned in previous lessons, an addicted person does not need to hit rock bottom to seek treatment. 
  • A loved one reluctant towards recovery may try comparing themselves to a worse off family member. This is irrelevant, we are here to help them, now. 
  • Both prescription and illegal substances attempt to replace other additions as suitable remedies. Addiction is a problem that is deeply rooted. Substances like marijuana are not applicable to recovery and prescriptions should be evaluated and monitored by a healthcare professional. 
  • It is very difficult for those close to a person of concern to recognize the true level of addiction. When one refers to themselves as “functional” they are more closely describing themselves as complacent in their addiction. Similar to moderation, acting as a functional alcoholic is a hoax. 

Myth Busting Addiction

“They have to hit rock bottom.”

One of the biggest roadblocks to seeking treatment is the myth that someone has to hit rock bottom before they can recover from a drug habit. The term “rock bottom” is a fallacy. It inspires a sort of Hollywood version of addiction in our minds, under a bridge with a brown paper bag. In reality, not many people have that experience, and most people choose to recover long before hitting rock bottom.

The decision to recover can come at any time. Recovery is there whenever the AP is ready for a new life, ready to be done with the sickness, the hangovers, and the consequences. Many young people have chosen recovery after just a few years of using. We want to recognize and take measures against addiction early to prevent anyone from hitting rock bottom. The AP doesn’t need to wait until they “lose everything” to recover. 

Families don’t stand by after a cancer diagnosis, silently watch the disease progress. No family member or doctor states, “The cancer has to reach its worst point before we try to help.” Success with any disease is early detection and early intervention. 

“They aren’t as bad as …”

When assessing someone’s addiction, it is common to compare them to another person that is worse off, giving the person of concern a pass because “they aren’t as bad as someone else.” An uncle in the family may have a mountain of legal issues and a habit of drinking in the morning. He sets the bar very low for a family attempting to draw a comparison. The addicted person will do the same thing, often using a relative or associate with major issues to justify the level of their own use.

If drinking or drug use is having any negative consequences, it is a problem and recovery can begin. Many people choose to start recovery prior to any negative experience. A healthier comparison for someone that is having a problem is to consider people who don’t drink, or someone that has entered into recovery early, don’t compare to someone worse than them. 

“I am a functional alcoholic.”

When someone defines themselves as a functional alcoholic, they usually mean, “My addiction doesn’t impede my work.” This statement is another justification, or a “hall pass” given to addiction. 

Most AP’s hold a portion of their life together, and maybe even excel in one particular aspect. However, their life as a whole may not function at a high level. The time spent drinking or using is robbing from other areas of their life. A working father might spend evenings drunk, ignoring family duties and the attention required to raise children. A passionate athlete may lose time and energy that could be allocated to training. 

Most addicted persons engage in a complex set of rules to “remain functional.” Some only drink on weekends, others at happy hour, or strictly in social situations. Many “pregame” before going out so that they can only have a few drinks at dinner, attempting to hide their use from their partner.

It is not when or how often someone drinks, but what happens when they drink. A sign of addiction is a lack of control once they start. If occasions that involve alcohol result in negative consequences, a problem is indicated. It is likely that your observations of their use don’t reflect the actual use pattern, no matter how well you know them.

Often we see that someone’s work has been altered to make room for a progressive addiction. AP’s stay in a salesperson role that encourages hard drinking, or accept isolating jobs that don’t have much oversight. When they are in the position of oversight, there is usually a double standard for what they do and what is acceptable for their employees. When someone says that they are a “functional alcoholic” we need to assess at what level they are actually functioning at. 

“Their doctor prescribed them Xanax.”

Xanax, a benzodiazepine, can be very addictive on its own, combined with alcohol Xanax (or Klonopin) can be dangerous. A typical dose of Xanax might be .25 or .5 MG. Caught in addiction, we often see people taking 1-2 MG several times per day adding up to 4, 6 or 8 MG of Xanax – the small pill can be deceptive, 6MG of Xanax is 20x what a typical dose is!. The dosage and frequency matters, Xanax is generally not meant for long-term treatment of anxiety. 

Addicted individuals are often dishonest with the doctor that prescribed them anxiety medications. “I drink socially,” they tell the doctor after describing severe depression and anxiety symptoms. The doctor doesn’t stand a chance at giving the correct diagnosis or medications. 

Anxiety and depression are common co-occurring disorders that go hand-in-hand with addiction. A hang-over from alcohol feels like depression, and cravings for more alcohol feels like anxiety. People are on Xanax to treat the anxiety caused by alcohol; Xanax is also short acting, after a few hours, anxiety returns at the same or higher level than it was before taking the pill.  It is common to see an AP on a carousel of medications to treat the anxiety associated with their use.

Scrutiny should be paid to the doctor that prescribes the medications, individuals with access to reputable healthcare often seek out physicians on the fringes with the inclination that they will be liberal with writing these types of medications.

“They are trying a moderation program.”

Let’s face it, the AP is not trying a moderation program. The very desire to attempt to control drinking proves that the person is addicted; non-addicted people don’t need to attempt to moderate, and don’t spend any time thinking about it., We see people spend years trying to moderate. Heck, the addicted person has spent a lifetime up to this point trying to moderate. 

Sobriety is a goal that is achievable, moderation tends to be a brief purgatory followed by another bender. Families are beaten down emotionally with the false promise, “I will drink less.” What is “less” to an addicted person? One less beer during a blackout, or one less sip of wine before driving? Moderation can not be defined or benchmarked, its ambiguity prolongs solving the actual problem.

“They only smoke pot.”

Cannabis has reached a level of acceptance that is almost greater than alcohol. It is common that parents tell us, “Oh, he smokes a little pot.” The pot of the 60s through 90s might have contained 1-6% THC; today’s cannabis can have THC contents of over 51%.

While people use cannabis to help with pain or sleeping, they might use it only once or twice a day, just as a non-alcoholic might have a glass or two of wine at night. An AP might smoke pot when they first wake up and several times per hour, all day long. If someone drank alcohol with this pattern, it would be obvious that they were addicted. 

“I need it to treat my anxiety” is a common explanation from someone smoking a lot of pot. The rapid up and down cycles of a cannabis high are likely the cause of the anxiety they are attempting to resolve. Frequency of use and the dosage of THC matter and both are impossible to quantify, edibles and vape pens make it easy to conceal the actual level of use. Like all forms of addiction, cannabis use can have negative consequences. We have to assess all aspects of a person’s life to determine whether it is detrimental. If cannabis use is preventing a full life, it is an addiction.

The stigma around illegal drugs, that one is worse than the other, attempts to minimize addiction. “They only smoke pot” or “They don’t do any kind of hard drug” are excuses that replace one addiction with another in order to justify use.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.

Stages of Change

Stages of Change

The Stages of Change refer to the thoughts and actions required to choose recovery and enter treatment. To make this big transition, an addicted person is first pre-contemplative, and then contemplative. Once they have thought about recovery, they move onto preparation and action. Finally a maintenance routine is set in place to support long term recovery. 

  • Before considering change, an addicted person experiences the “four R’s” of Pre-contemplation. 
  • When contemplating the AP is still on the fence until they commit the next step. 
  • Preparation begins when they seek the help of a healthcare professional. 
  • Real changes start occurring once action has been taken with the help of a professional. 
  • After treatment, maintenance including coaching and 12 steps programs are necessary components of success. 

When we contemplate making a change there is a decision making process that we go through. The best example of this is when we have gotten a bit out of shape and are considering going on a diet or the gym. For a while we think it’s okay to not work out (pre-contemplative), then we consider joining a gym (contemplative). We then go to the gym (action) and finally we become dedicated to our new routines (maintenance). 

Reviewing Stages of Change:

1. Pre-contemplation

In the first stages of addiction recovery, a person usually does not consider their behavior to be an issue. At this point, they aren’t interested in hearing advice to quit or being told about potentially harmful side effects. We have all experienced this person. We know if we mention that they have a problem, they will ‘blow up’. This knee-jerk response is an indication that they are pre-contemplative.

Pre-contemplation takes several forms:

  • Reluctance: Lack awareness of their problem, as well as the motivation to change.
  • Rebellious: Do not want to let go of their addictive behavior because they do not like being told what to do.
  • Resigned: Overwhelmed by their addictive behavior that they’ve given up hope for the possibility of change.
  • Rationalizing: Think they have all the answers and have reasons why substance use isn’t an issue for them.

2. Contemplation

Contemplators have realized that they have a problem. They may want to change, but do not feel like they can fully commit to it. In this stage, a person is often more receptive to learning about the potential consequences of their behavior and the different options available.

However, they are still only contemplating. They haven’t yet made a change by committing to a specific strategy. The contemplation stage can last for years, oscillating between pre-contemplation and preparation.

3. Preparation

A person is committed and ready to take some actions. They actively research their problem, and research options for a cure. They might meet with a healthcare professional to assess where they are and determine options for a long-term treatment plan or attend some meetings.

4. Action

Real change starts at this stage. 

A plan of action has been put into place, and the person in recovery knows that they must do the work that is required. They are no longer just considering change. They want to make change as fast as possible.

5. Maintenance

It takes time and effort to sustain any change. In the maintenance stage, a person begins to adapt to their new substance-free lifestyle. As they build momentum, reverting to old habits gradually becomes less of a threat.

Sometimes the best intervention is one in which we work one-on-one with the person of concern. A traditional placement in rehab is not always right for everyone. There are many options for recovery, and exploring these with the person of concern allows them to be in charge of their recovery.

Recovery coaching is helpful as:

  • An alternative to inpatient residential treatment
  • A way to get back on track after relapse
  • A structured after care plan after residential treatment
  • An additional way to strengthen mutual-aid self-help groups

Recovery coaching focuses on these principles:

  • Future-Focused: Navigate the present, and set goals for the future
  • Professional Guidance: Follow proven plans with our 30- and 90-day programs
  • Accountability: Reinforce accountability through meetings, phone calls, and homework
  • Build on 12 Steps: Strengthen other programs with which you may be involved
  • Real-Life: Learn how to stay sober in the actual environments where you live and work

Most people respond very well to coaching interventions and many people can avoid in-patient treatment with daily accountability and connecting to the proper resources. You have the power to live a better life, let us guide you there. By understanding the stages of change, we will develop a plan that greatly increases your chances of succeeding.

 

About Adam Banks

Adam Banks is a certified interventionist and the owner of Adam Banks Recovery. After receiving an MBA from the University of Chicago, Adam built a company acquired by United Health Care. His discipline and attention to detail comes from his former career as an airline pilot, holding an ATP, the FAA’s highest license.

Today, Adam is dedicated to helping others achieve long-term sobriety. His work has guided executives, pilots, and physicians on paths to recovery. Adam brings families together through a loving and inclusive approach. Adam has authored four books on addiction. His recent work, Navigating Recovery Ground School: 12 Lessons to Help Families Navigate Recovery, educates families on the entire intervention process. He also offers a free video course for families considering an intervention for a loved one.

Adam is available for alcohol and drug intervention services in New York, Long Island, the Hamptons as well as nationally and internationally.